Weird Musicians R Us
by Starlite-Destiny
Summary: Starlite takes a trip to Weird Musicians R Us to find the perfect companion. Taki bashing and giant rapist monks on the loose!
1. Default Chapter

Weird Musicians R Us

Starlite: More funny randomness! YAY!

Aiko: I'm not in this one...(cries)

Starlite: Cram it...Anyway, I don't own Gravitation or it's characters, but I do own Weird Musicians R Us.

Aiko: (Still sobbing uncontrolably)

Starlite: .........................

Starlite: Ah! Time for a relaxing trip to Weird Musicians R Us! (walks up to a large purple building and goes in)

Tohma: Hello! Welcome to Weird Musicians R Us! How may I help you?

Starlite: I'm looking for a weird musician. Can you help me?

Tohma: Why yes! We have a large selection of weird musicians. Right this way.

They first entered an aisle that had a heading over it that said "Retired Models".

Tohma: This is where we put our discount musicians that nobody wants anymore.

They came upon a box labeled "Taki" on the outside. It seemed to be for sale very cheap.

Tohma: I will sell you this one for about 5 cents.

Starlite: Hmmmm...That seems like a good bargain but let me see it before I buy it.

Tohma: (sigh) If you insist...(opens the box)

Taki: Ahhhh! The sunlight! It burns!

Starlite: You don't get out much do you?

Taki: Are you thinking about buying me?!?!?!

Tohma: NO TAKI NO!!! DON'T DO IT AGAIN!!!!!

Taki: (starts crying extremely hard) Help me!! I don't want to be hit by a car again!! I want to find a nice home and raise a family!! Help!!!!

Starlite:........He has cobwebs on him...........

Tohma: (sweatdrop) Let's get out of this aisle.

The next aisle they came upon was an aisle that said "Strange Singers" above it.

Tohma: This aisle has our more popular models in it.

Starlite: Ah! What is this one? (points to a random box)

Tohma: That is Shuichi Shindou. He is a very popular model, but he dosn't want to go home with anyone but Yuki and Yuki won't come and get him...

Starlite: Ah...Well what are you waiting for?! Open the box!

Tohma: (sigh) If you insist.....(opens the box)

Shuichi: Yuki?! Has my Yuki come to get me?! YUKI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Where for art thou Yuki?! YUKI MY LOVE!!!!!!!

Starlite: BOX IT UP QUICK!!!

Tohma: But you just told me to...

Starlite: Find a different one before I get mugged!!!

Tohma: (sigh) If you insist...

The next box they came to was one labeled "Ryuichi". It had a high price tag on it.

Starlite: What is this one?

Tohma: This is our most popular model. I will sell it to you for 987,768,876,768,657,545,767,432,342, 454, 345, 546, 546, 879,120,199,879,83245 plus a ball of lint and a pink glittery tiger scented candle holder that is over 324 years old and used to be owned by hairy giant monks that ran around New Zealand in snake skin cowboy boots and matching halter tops.

Starlite: Let's see what it is like.

Tohma: If you insist...(opens the box)

Ryuichi: (yawn) Huh? What's up Tohma?

Tohma: You have a visitor.

Ryuichi: YAY! Kumagorou likes visitors!

Starlite: He's so cute!!! Awww!!! (glomps Ryuichi)

Ryuichi: (Glomps Starlite)

Tohma: (glomps a giant monk)

Giant Monk: (glomps a picnic basket)

Picnic Basket: (glomps a telephone pole)

Telephone Pole: Buzzzz...

Tohma: (starts pole dancing on the pole)

Starlite and Ryu: (claps)

Telephone Pole: I feel violated...

Giant Monk: (grabs Tohma) Come on! You're coming with me! Monks need a little loving every now and again too.

Tohma: AHHH!! HELP!! I'm being raped by a monk!!!

And nobody believed him because monks are supposed to be holy.

Nobody: I believed him!!!

Narrator: My point exactly...

Nobody: (sobs)

Meanwhile.....

Starlite: I guess now that Tohma is gone I can take you with out paying right?

Ryuichi: Yup!

Starlite: It wouldn't have mattered anyway. I had they money to buy you anyway. And I even had the pink glittery tiger scented candle holder that was over 324 years old and used to be owned by hairy giant monks that ran around New Zealand in snake skin cowboy boots and matching halter tops.

Ryu: And the 987,768,876,768,657,545,767,432,342, 454, 345, 546, 546, 879,120,199,879,83245?

Starlite: Yup!

Ryu: Kewlness! Wanna go get pizza?

Starlite: Sure!

And that is why you will never see Tohma near another monk for as long as he lives.

The End...Or is it? Mwahahahaha!!!

Starlite: Did you like it? Did you hate it? I don't care! Just **REVIEW WITH NO FLAMES!!!**


	2. IMPORTANT AUTHOR NOTE

_**Important Author's Note!!!**_

I have created another account, and intend on continuing writing there. If there is a fic that you would greatly want me to continue, please message me at either this account or my new account, JumpingPantsSauce, and I will. I still love all of my previous material, but would like to get past my childish writing ways and do not have enough time in my day to go back and fix all of my errors. Thank you so much for all your support over the years as Starlite, and now I would love it if you would support me now as JPS.


End file.
